You wanna piece of me!

Woke up after NYE 06/07 The Best Party Ever (photo post coming soon)… only to find a weird red bump in a strange spot… hypochondria set in and stories of tick bites, lyme disease and breast cancer drove me to the doctor. I thought he’d just say.. oh, its nothing, come back if it doesn’t go away in a few days, but no, he gets a magnifying glass out, has a closer look, prods around a bit and then goes..

“hmm, I don’t know what it is, I think I should give you a local anaesthetic take a biopsy out and send it off to pathology”

Me: “is it a tick bite?”

“..perhaps, I really don’t know what it is, I don’t think it’s cancer, but best to be thorough”

Great. So he stuck a big needle in me and then got a scalpel and cut a bit out. It was no good.

After a week of thinking I had lyme disease and chronic fatigue, I went back to get the results, and he had totally no clue who I was or why I was there, so I reminded him that he had a small piece of me in a jar somewhere and could he please tell me the test results..

“Ah, yes, you have folliculitis”

Me: “What??”

“folliculitis”

Me: “Are saying it was an ingrown hair?”

Him: “Yes, nothing to worry about, just a folliculitis. Are you ok now? No pain? Yes, well, off you go then, nothing more to worry about”

Who the fuck says folliculitis anyway and what kind of Dr cant tell the difference between folliculitis, a tick bite, and cancer with out performing a surgical procedure?